Every year during the time my daughters are selling Girl Scout cookies, often my conservative friends, fellow fathers advocates (by the way, I’m really a joint custody guy) and once, just some random guy in a store, they ask me how I could support the Girl Scouts. My social media feeds and the click-bait articles that permeate my news streams also choose this time of year to denigrate the organization for alleged ties to Planned Parenthood and militant feminists. I have even been asked how I justify being affiliated with the Girl Scouts while claiming to be a Christian. I would like to share my experience to explain why I am proud to be a Girl Scout Dad.
From October 2009 to August 2011 I was separated from my daughters by a very unpleasant divorce. In addition to the traditional husband and wife dynamic of our divorce, I had chosen to resist the current system in terms of not being a stereotype placed on fathers and refused to have my time with my daughters curtailed. I found myself at odds with several angry family counselors who decided to cast me into their preconceived punitive mold of how bad parents are and even went as far as trying to fabricate a confession from my daughter of a horrible nature that would have ended. my rights forever. I had a misandrist for a judge who went so far as to end the custody hearing and force mediation when, due to expert testimony, the narrative shifted away from his narrow world mindset.
As a compromise in my custody hearing to get joint custody and fair parenting time, I agreed to attend a 24 week program that was supposed to teach conflict resolution skills, but instead it was 24 weeks of male shaming. By the fall of 2011, it’s an understatement to say that I was fed up with misandry.
Restarting a functional relationship with my oldest daughter, I told her I wanted to do an activity that would allow us to bond during my relegated weekend time. She chose the Brownies, I tried to offer her other activities and I wasn’t sure if this was an environment I wanted to expose her to. I reluctantly agreed to attend. For the first year, I was just a mom leaving her, but I liked the lessons she was being taught and began to see the difference between female empowerment and what I had seen. I observed the confidence my daughter was learning and the stability that the organization and her new friends were bringing to her life. The second year, the troop had leadership changes and more delegation of volunteer roles. My daughter knew of my interest in the outdoors and encouraged me to join her troop’s campout, so I took on my first leadership role as one of the troop campers. As I got involved with other volunteers, I found the Girl Scout world to be very welcoming. Contrary to my own preconceived ideas of what female empowerment would look like, I found the teachings to be very much in line with what I was teaching my daughters. From career encouragement with STEM experience to lessons in personal responsibility, I loved the Girl Scouting experience for my daughters. When my youngest daughter turned the minimum age of 5, she was excited to receive a Girl Scout membership and Daisy apron for her birthday.
The next fall I tried to place my youngest daughter in a troop of my own and could not find a troop meeting at a time that would work with my parenting time. I raised my problem with the local Service Unit and was surprised that they encouraged me to form my own troop. So I surprised myself and did it!
Since the fall of 2014, I have been a Girl Scout troop leader. I have been very happy with the curriculum and the experiences we give the girls. Each troop is autonomous and, ultimately, leadership reverts to the girls and the adults simply guide.
In my 5 years as a troop leader, I have never been asked to teach anything that goes against my beliefs as a Christian, and in fact, Girl Scouts offers a pin that girls can earn annually called My promise, my faith that encourages girls to explore their own faith. This pin encourages girls to individually explore the connection between Girl Scout principles and the beliefs girls are learning in their own home. The girls bring one of the tenets of Scouting to a woman of their faith who was also a Scout and see how the two teachings intertwine.
If I was convinced that there was damage to the faith of my girls, I would have thrown them away. I have found in my area that local churches and troops have a relationship of providing meeting spaces and meeting places, while the 2 groups are separate in their teachings, they are still allied in wanting a prosperous future for girls.
I have men in some of my social circles ask me why I haven’t taken the leap to put my daughters in Boy Scouts now that it’s an option. My answer is simple, Girl Scouting has created great memories, experiences, and supportive friendships for both of my girls. The lessons, opportunities, and connections my daughters have made have given them experiences they would not otherwise have had. Summer camps, visits to the state capitol, STEM expos, horseback riding, and overnight trips with your friends are amazing childhood memories that you couldn’t have given them. They are happy where they are.
In addition to the positive experiences and support for my daughters, I have had positive experiences and memories together with my daughters. I mentioned earlier where I was in 2011. I was very wary of women of power. The changes I have experienced here have been amazing. The support from Girl Scout leaders and parents has been very encouraging. They have never discouraged me from trying new things with my daughters and have provided me with the resources and contacts to be a better influence in my daughters’ lives. The friendships I’ve made with Girl Scout leaders and volunteers have been an incredible influence on my own worldview. By leading girls, sometimes they aren’t the only ones who learn valuable lessons.
The opinions expressed in this article are simply my own personal response to various posts, articles, and even personal inquiries. My statements expressed are my own and do not reflect or are intended to be the official statement of the Girl Scouts of the United States, Girl Scouts of Greater Atlanta, or any individual troop or service unit with which they may be affiliated. I’m just a parent and a writer, feel free to like my Facebook page for other similar articles.