The curse of every hardworking manager. Love them or hate them, with geographically dispersed teams and travel restrictions, conference calls are here to stay as a means of workplace communication. If you want to stand out from your co-workers, follow these simple tips on the do’s and don’ts of effective conference calls.

Here are my favorite conference call experiences;

a barking dog drowns out the key point of discussion, bad enough but the owner starts yelling at his pet.
· a thirsty caller uses the hold button while going out for a drink, inadvertently music on hold starts playing for everyone on the call.
a chatty colleague uses the mute button to complain about the call, preventing you from answering the senior manager’s question you’re trying to impress.

Obviously, I would discourage all of these career-limiting behaviors, so what are the pros and cons of effective teleconferences?

Take comfort in the fact that you will be speaking in front of a group and not receiving visual cues or feedback.

Use the correct phone in a quiet room without disturbance.

Do not use cell phones or phones that pick up background noise. Calling from an open office is the equivalent of having a conversation in a nightclub. If you really can’t find a quiet room, use the mute button until prompted to speak.

To avoid a Homer Simpson-style “Doh” moment, learn how to use the mute button and other phone technology. His clever contributions mean nothing if no one can hear them.

Set up the meeting in advance and communicate the dial-in number, access codes, and other information. “Spring forward, fall back” is something to keep in mind for your colleagues crossing the time zone. Don’t calculate time differences with your fingers: check the internet or even call a colleague in that country and ask what time it is.

Start the meeting absolutely on time; don’t reward bad behavior for latecomers by waiting for them. Take a role call at the beginning of the meeting, highlighting the missing attendees. Go ahead and get hard, people will love you for it!

Treat the conference call like a meeting. You know the routine; prepare and circulate an agenda, take notes ya-de-ya-de-ya.

Have each caller say hello and introduce themselves. Although they may never meet in person, he is a good relationship builder and makes the most shy people at least say his name.

Don’t assume that everyone recognizes your voice. Unless you’re disrespecting the boss and want to remain incognito, say your name before you speak. This is particularly important for the poor soul taking meeting notes.

Make use of guest speakers. Invite a special or important guest and have them say a few words at the beginning of the meeting. No one will know you ran away after five minutes and you’ll get the benefit of undivided attention and the best behavior.

Don’t let the topic drift. Be an iron fist in a velvet glove: courteous but firm if people talk too much or about each other. If your callers are sitting at home in their pajamas having a hot chocolate, keep in mind that all they want is to go to bed.

Request information using a person’s name. People will pay more attention to avoid the embarrassment of having to repeat the question.

Don’t mix papers; scraping chairs, tapping with a pencil, humming, or other loud, distracting activities. It drives… people… crazy!

Close the meeting formally, thanking everyone for their time. That little acknowledgment will make him feel good about talking to you again.

And that’s it. Apart from a very personal advice. She doesn’t sit in a leather chair. Ever. The problem is that every time you move, an embarrassing noise is emitted that has the right frequency to transmit it well on the phone. Either you brazen and suffer the comments about your faulty digestive system, or you stay put until the call is over. If you only take one piece of advice, make sure it’s this: use cloth-covered seats!

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